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Location, Location, Location

I had to move from Brooklyn. I was going broke, and couldn't maintain my lifestyle anymore. It felt like I was being exiled to the far reaches of Gaul. In reality, I moved to Salem, MA (because I bought a condo here two years prior). I even recently went back to New York City to see how I felt about it after being away for 8 months. I spent two months there working, and hanging out. I have to be honest. New York City is like fucking a ten. When you leave it for anywhere else it feels like you've stepped down. Anywhere else feels like you're fucking a six. It is a rough transition going from pounding a gorgeous ten to a homely six. There is hope though!

It is all in how you frame the situation.

The ten, that is NYC, will make you pay for it. NYC is a harsh mistress. She won't fly coach, will never pick up a round of drinks, and will bleed your wallet dry. The upside to NYC are her knockers, and how she bangs you. It is a wild ride. You'll feel like you've been depleted of every last bit of life force. This is fine for when you are young, but as you get older the ten takes more than she gives.

The six, that is Salem, will make you feel loved. Salem is a homely six, but she is a solid lay. She makes sure you are always fed, and she makes sure you are valued. She may not be exciting like the ten, but she makes up for it in other ways. You trade excitement for stability.

Get it while your young! If you aren't rich then get away from the ten, and put a ring on the six! Live it up, kids. When you get older you got to think about the long game.

If you're younger than 30, please by all means enjoy the city. If you're over 30 (and not rich) please, do yourself a favor, get out before that succubus can bleed you dry!


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© 2017 Zach Danesh

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