"I could have been a contender." Brando uttered in the 1954 classic, "On the Waterfront".
Haven't we all thought that? Haven't we all lamented in this vein?
I spent most of my young adulthood in cities. I was a city guy. I worked in hospitality. I worked with folks who wanted more. I wanted more too, and still do. I think most young people who move to the Big Apple are doing two things. They are running towards something, and running away from something. Both are great motivators.
When I left the city I was running away from the rat race. I was running toward a future. It's been a great decision. I have achieved, grown, lived, and found grounding. My two motivators of running away and towards set me up for success.
The one motivator that continues to distract me, dissuade me, and destroy me is "FOMO". Yes, FOMO is not a helpful motivator. Fear of missing out is an illusion. We don't know what we would be missing out on. We'll never know if we should have, could have, or would have. So, we can't dwell on it. We need to run from and towards. FOMO will only leave you stuck in place. It only crushes your own momentum by replacing it with nothingness.
"I could have been a contender". Well, we never will know will we? So, we need to move forward, and away from this want. We need to find a new way in which to be a contender.
Goals are great, but illusive. Life has it's own flow like the ocean. Man cannot fight the waves. You need to ride them. I hope everyone can accomplish their goals, but it isn't the reality. We need to have "adult maturity".
There are practical steps in order to achieve success. One is to define what success means to you, and if necessary open up the definition. This isn't a copout. It's a way to open up your mind to possibility. Be creative. Find smaller goals, and attack them day by day. Have backup plans, and continue acquiring skill. Don't let people naysay you. Surround yourself with strong people, and you'll become stronger. Cut out people who make you weaker, and you will won't be held back.
Don't dwell in the past. Don't sulk. Don't get stuck. "I could have been a contender." Maybe, you could do something equal or better than that! Maybe, just maybe, you are a contender already.