I got back to it at the Grappling Industries Submission Only Tournament 2019 (Brown Belt Division). This victory was sweet, because I crashed and burned in Las Vegas (World's Tournament, Purple Belt Masters). I got choked clean out, and when I awoke I realized that I blew a major opportunity. I did learn a very serious lesson through. I applied it to this contest. It was a great feeling to be able to achieve this. It wasn't the toughest tournament I'd been in, but it was arduous as always.
I don't like competing, and that's why I do it. I love Jiu-Jitsu, because it isn't theoretical. We can test it and we can see if we have been improving. There are a lot of snake-oil salesmen out there selling fake martial arts. Fake martial arts are systems that cannot be tested in sparring or fighting; they exist as masturbatory practices without merit. Jiu-Jitsu hit the mainstream when Royce Gracie destroyed his opponents in the first UFC fights. It was then that the world would learn of this Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, and see how worthwhile it was. Contest for me at this point in time is worthwhile. I can't rationalize dedicating so much of my time to something that isn't real. Every time I go for a tournament or other contest I get to see what I've learned. I've found that I have been learning a lot. My gym, North Shore Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu academy, has elevated me to heights I would have never predicted so many years ago.
Williamsburg Mixed Martial Arts was my undergraduate education, and North Shore Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Academy has been my grad school, so to speak. I got to focus deeply on Jiu-Jitsu. I put all of my attention to this one modality of hand to hand combat. That doesn't mean I still don't play with boxing or kickboxing. I spend a lot of time on the mats with my team perfecting technique. I do this to see if I can summon it at the ready. It's an endeavor based in reality. You win or you lose, and that is the truth.
I spend a lot fo time drawing and writing. I make shit up daily. Life influences art, but it is a subjective practice. I cannot see the benefits of what I do. Some people like my work, but I've yet to make money or gain a huge fanbase. I do it, because I love it. Practice is a way of life. I believe mastering skills is a worthwhile endeavor, but it is more worthwhile if we can see results. Philosophy becomes worthwhile when we can apply it to our lives. I spent time learning math I'd never use in my life. I've spent time learning propaganda that was just plain false. Maybe nothing is wasted, and it all becomes important in forming the product of an existence. I'm at a point in my life where I need to see results. I can't live in make-believe land forever. I need to see if my bow and arrow choke is effective. I need to prove to myself that my open guard has become real.
I believe in objective truth, and that's why I do Jiu-Jitsu. I don't have time to play around in white pajamas and not see results. I spend a lot of time playing around with crayons and markers. I do have a life of dreams, and these dreams almost never manifest into reality. It's important to dream. It's important to aspire to do more, to be more. We cannot live solely in the dream world though. Our bodies and minds are here in this realm, the realm of the living. I am now a brown belt in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. I just broke it in with a win. I will be sure to win again, and also lose again. I am sure that I will continue to gain insight. I know that this is a beginning of a new chapter, and it will get written no matter what. There is only so much time on this tiny blue marble. I only have so much time. We mustn't stop dreaming, but we can't dream our lives away. We are here now, and we can affect the world around us by putting foot to ass (or a bow and arrow choke to carotid arteries).